insanity

relatively permanent disorder of the mind

Insanity, craziness or madness is a spectrum of behaviors characterized by certain abnormal mental or behavioral patterns.

Insanity is the second album from melodic death metal band Darkane. It was released on March 6, 2001.

insane - Exhibiting unsoundness or disorder of mind; not sane; mad; deranged in mind; delirious; distracted; Used by, or appropriated to, insane persons; as, an insane hospital; Causing insanity or madness; Characterized by insanity or the utmost folly; chimerical; unpractical

a deranged state of the mind usually occurring as a specific disorder (as schizophrenia)

such unsoundness of mind or lack of understanding as prevents one from having the mental capacity required by law to enter into a particular relationship, status, or transaction or as removes one from criminal or civil responsibility

extreme folly or unreasonableness

(highlighted in red, you will find the correct definition of 'insanity', proving that i am NOT insane as was previously suspected. i am not a death metal album, melodic or otherwise)

ahi!

last night we went to a nice restaurant that sits right next to a river. i had never been there so i started looking for something local and fresh on the menu...no such luck, no local fish only ocean fish probably frozen. on the appetizer list they had ahi tuna which is one of my favorite things, so i asked the waitress if they could put it on a salad for me. she said they had such a salad on the lunch menu and they could give me that. so about 20 minutes later out came my salad. i could see that it had been encrusted with something along with the usual sesame seeds but it didn't occur to me to wonder what it was. i just took a big bite and started chewing. well, my eyes started watering, my nose started running and burning, my face turned bright red, i started considering my options which didn't seem to include spitting it out in a crowded restaurant and the only thing that could run through my head was what in the world did they put on this salad, the dressing was on the side, there wasn't any strange veggies on it, then i realized as i painfully tried to swallow the last of the huge bite in my mouth...ah, wasabi, the tuna is green on the outside...why oh why would they want to put that much wasabi on a piece of fish. i know there are people out there that like it and i even like some when its in dressing or mixed with soy sauce, but i couldn't taste the fish or anything else for that matter. this was a fairly expensive restaurant and i couldn't exactly just order something else. after a little while of me pushing it around on my plate wondering if i could scrape enough off to eat it the waitress came over and asked how i liked it. i don't complain about food after its already been brought to me unless its really bad. like if i ask for no tomatoes and they show up i just take them off and never say a word. but what was i going to do, i told her i didn't think i could eat it because there was so much wasabi on it. she asked me what i wanted to do and said she would ask but she might have to charge a portion of it too me. i told her to go find out and give me salmon or something to put on the salad. she did, and she was actually really sweet about it and didn't charge me which is a good thing because i was sitting there thinking wasabi is something a waitress might want to mention when giving something to someone when its not on the menu. the moral of the story is, don't order ahi tuna without knowing what its going to be drowned in, and if its wasabi, probably go for something else...unless you like tasting wasabi and nothing else at all.

birthday number 28

yesterday morning i woke up in a unusually fantastic mood. let me just fill you in on my morning attitude on work days. i get up at 6:30. am. i make it to work without too much drama but as soon as social interaction is introduced the attitude shows up and you might as well just not talk to me till at least 10:00 unless you are one of three people only one of which works in my office. that one person is my boss and she is excluded from the crabby attitude only because of her status as my immediate supervisor and also she is usually way too sweet for me to be mean to...not always though so its a good thing she is so understanding. let me put it this way, at one of our monthly staff meetings a new person commented "oh leah i didn't know you weren't a morning person" to something i said or did, well the entire room burst out in laughter that it took them so long to realize. anyway, back to yesterday. i was really happy, in fact i have a suspicion that the recent refill of my thyroid medicine might have been the culprit because i magically have more refills, like maybe my doctor told them next time i reorder to change the amount. i know it wasn't due to coffee because i hadn't had any yet. this good mood lasted until exactly 11:45 when my wonderful husband (who really had no intention of ruining my day really) informed me that he would be working on my birthday...the day we were suppose to be leaving for vacation and getting somewhere in time for me to do something to celebrate. i know he didn't have a choice and he really did do his best to leave as early as he could (2am) so he could get back as soon as possible. still that meant that i would be spending the majority of my birthday home alone probably cleaning and packing. so the rest of the day was spent in an equally opposite amount of serious depression. i did my best not to take it out on people (unsuccessfully) and went to bed fairly early taking melatonin to speed up the process.

so this morning i slept as long as i could which turned out to be around 8:30 unfortunately. i decided i would make the best of it. after all it was my birthday and what is my favorite thing? saturday mornings when i can get up slowly, alone, and do whatever i want. so to start things off i caught up on a few blogs (thank you very much jill and appocalipstic for having such entertaining things for me to read) that put me in a better mood. soon i was getting birthday wishes from family and that helped quite a bit too. i decided as a birthday present to myself i would buy myself some michael jackson songs. what you say? how does a person go through 28 years of life without owning one michael jackson song? i dont' know how that happened but it was remedied this morning and soon i was dancing around my house cleaning and singing along with smooth criminal and don't stop till you get enough. this inspired me to make a birthday playlist which included these and other songs that have taken me through life like prince, faith no more, feist, heartless bastards, and dragonette, along with lots of others that generally put me in a good mood. so by the time we were ready to leave i was actually having a decent day. so off we went to boise (i know, why, well its something i we both wanted to do and i won't try explaining but i'm actually pretty excited about it) a playlist called birthday number 28 playing over the speakers, straight through the middle of nowhere (i think that is the actual name of the middle of oregon) to the mountains and back out again to arrive in the city losing an hour that i will get back on a day that is not my birthday so i might have to take an hour of another day to finish things up. we headed to our motel where a duck was hanging out in the check in area for some reason and the guy behind the desk who's phone rings with some r&b song asked us if we were the last ones to check in. i said...as in...ever? he laughed and said he only meant the last ones with reservations. so here we are, an unknown adventure spreading out in front of us.

i guess in the end i can't expect other people to make as big of a deal out of birthdays as i do. its important to me and as a child i was always made to feel so special and loved by my family that i guess i just expected other people would have had those same sorts of experiences and want to do the same thing as they got older. but in reality, no they don't. today i learned that i could make it special all on my own with a little help from distant family and friends wishing me happiness.

something learned this year

don't count your chickens before they hatch and probably you should wait until after they are sexed because probably they are not all chickens and you most likely don't want a chicken coop full of roosters...actually unless you just don't like sleep at all you probably won't want any roosters.

L.

a day at the balloon stampede

welcome to the walla walla balloon stampede, we are here to search...i mean serve you.

make yourself comfortable and watch the amazing puppets show that has absolutely no ulterior motives.

one of our friendly feathered guides will make sure you find your way to the right places.

just look at all our happy customers

you'll be happiest when we've taken control of your body...i mean look the easter bunny.

if you like cinnamon rolls you'll love deep fried cinnamon rolls.

there's something for everyone in our drug, i mean food aisle.

if you like coke...here at the balloon stampede we deep fry everything.

of course the experience wouldn't be complete without at least one mohawk.

we have not one

but two spidermen

pay no attention to death lurking around the park, we'll be disposing of him with the rest of the bodies, i mean, death? what? where?

o man, not again

being a man would be easier. i've said it before and i'll say it again and again and again and i'll always be right. the world tells me that i can do anything a man can do, that we have the same opportunities as women and can achieve just as much (even more!) than men. well, i'm not Oprah or Martha or Madonna for that matter. the world does not look at me and see intelligence and character. oh sure sure, after getting to know me the world might get that look in his (yes the world is a man) eye and give me a curt nod and a jab on the shoulder and say "you're alright kiddo and you're one talented human". but at first glance, the world (being male) looks at me and sees a single working woman on her feet in heels for six or seven hours every day serving and selling wine for a living. the heels are for my benefit, not yours, o dear world...but that's not the point. the point i'm trying to make is that being a man would be easier and here is my most recent (among many) illustrations as to why: amid the bustle of a busy night at the wine bar with my male co-worker i overhear a couple as they are leaving their first visit with us ask my partner in crime "so, is this place yours?" and he replies to the negative. i look over in time to see them briefly glance at me and then continue to tell him how much they love it and then they are gone. this is not the first time. this is not the second time. i've actually lost count. for the record i've worked there the longest and poured so much of myself into that store that i feel as though i could call it mine and have it not be a lie. but i'm a woman. it couldn't possibly be my store, could it world?

for the record, when i tell my male friends that its so much easier being a man...they never disagree.

...R...