bukowski's puzzle

i've been working on this for a little while, and i think i'm ready for some feedback...well?

...R...

what not to pack

last weekend i took a flight to seattle. i've had my bags looked through plenty of times and its never been a big deal, but this time was a little different. so here's how it goes. i packed the bare minimum and didn't check anything so could check in online, got to the tiny airport in yakima (not even a gift shop here, so really as small as they get) and sat in the waiting area because apparently its such a small airport they open security about 30 minutes before boarding. while i was waiting i was sitting behind two old lady's talking about weird things like how cheese would be a good snack to take on a flight but "the thing about cheese is if you don't have a refrigerator your screwed" followed immediately by quilting patterns and which ones they were working on etc... finally security opened and i headed through. confident that i would have no problems because i looked through my bag multiple times for anything that they might want to stop me for. as i put my bag in the little bucket thing i slammed it into the head of the guy behind me who was leaning over to pick up his bag. i apologized profusely and he mostly ignored me and the probable bruise forming on his head (people act strange at airports). things went downhill from there. after making it through the line picking up my shoes and purse i was pulled aside so they could look through my bag. of course i thought, why wouldn't they want to look through my mostly empty bag. still, she was being nice about it and its not like the plane was waiting for me so i stood there calmly as she pulled out half the contents and went to run them separately, nope not that time, still in the bag. she came back and looked through the pockets a second time and pulled out everything but my underwear and ran that stuff separately, nope not that time either. she came back and said hmm i just don't see it anywhere it looks like a little, well no i won't say, then she proceeded to look through the pockets a third time. at this point i'm only half paying attention thinking she'll lose interest and say its fine soon. mostly i'm spacing off out the window watching for the plane to arrive and only glancing at her every so often. finally she checks the pockets one more time and pulls out, no not nail clippers the only thing i could think of that might have gotten lost in there somewhere, but a bullet. i gasped and turned beet red and said something like "what the! how? wow, i don't know how i could have possibly missed that or how it got in there but you can throw it away i don't need it" she just kind of smiled and said we can't just throw these kinds of things away (of course, yes i know you can't throw bullets away its not lipgloss for crying out loud) we'll just have to fill out some paperwork and ask you some questions. luckily this is yakima not seattle and they are always really nice there. a cop and two security officers came over took my license and asked me if i had guns (no my husband does) what does he use them for (recreational only) things along this line and also asked if my information on my license was current three times. they filled out a report and took a picture of it next to the bullet and my license (exhibit a). the cop officially announced that he was taking possession of the round and then went to check my criminal history, which apparently was clean. or it was anyway, now i will most likely never get through security quickly again and i may start checking everything just to avoid the stupid scanners. as for how the bullet got there, i'm not sure. there was an open box in the area that i usually keep the bag so maybe one fell in but otherwise it really had no way of getting there. after all that i had to go sit and wait to board with my fellow passengers who i'm sure were very intent on watching the whole thing since there wasn't exactly anything else to do in the tiny terminal. at least the poor man who got smacked with the offending bag got a little satisfaction. now when people ask him what happened to his head he can just smile slyly and say "it was worth it"

L.

notes on supply and pricing

this game is called "pretending to take notes during a supply and pricing meeting" as you can see, i got a lot out of this meeting and i will be going very far in this corporate ladder.

L.

experiment

"subliminal messages are so hard to send when i'm sleep deprived" she complained in a whisper. his eyes glanced over to meet hers. with a wink and a slight smile he seemed to say he was still on her radar even across the bustling room.

...R...

i miss you peter rabbit

i used to wake up every morning and open my blinds to find a little bunny waiting for me. i named him peter. peter was a very cute little guy who had many different moods.

here he is one morning feeling very tired. i'm pretty sure he had a major hangover that day and just didn't even want to look at anybody. i saw him look at my hat with envy as he had no hats to hide the dark circles under his bloodshot eyes.

hungover

one morning i found him a bit closer to my door and acting quite friendly! i think he'd been on a rather successful date the night before and was feeling very hopeful about his romantic future. keep in mind, this was before valentine's day when that little vixen he was seeing broke his heart.

romantically hopeful

after the valentines day depression wore off, peter only got more and more angry and bitter. you can see in this shot of him just a few weeks ago that he was falling deeper into that hole of despair and getting quite frustrated with love.

bitter

and here is the last time i saw peter. one morning he just had this empty, lost look in his eyes. he sat there completely still and deep in thought the whole morning before glancing my way and slowly hopping off.

forlorn

i miss you peter!!!

...R...

bird obituary

Johnny A. Sparrow died today at only 1 year old. He is survived by three siblings and preceded in death by both his parents who ironically met the same fate as he did. He was killed this morning in a tragic accident involving a dare between him and his friends. They were overheard planning to cross the road at inconvenient times to see who would be brave enough to actually do it. Star Ling spotted a green mustang coming at full speed and volunteered to be the first to go. He made it across but aimed too high and they all decided it didn't count. Next was Fez Zant who barely made it off the grass before the mustang slowed and swerved away making him run away. At that point the show off Maggie Pie showed up and darted out in front of the mustang nearly losing a wing in the process. Not to be shown up Johnny, his three little sisters following behind trying to stop him, went immediately in front of the mustang but he went too low and ended up under the green beast only to be tossed violently against the cement. Dr. Q. A. Lee tried to revive him but was nearly attacked himself and soon gave up. The small gathering of crows that witnessed the event tried to spread the rumor that it was an attempted mass suicide...some believe crows not to be crossed in matters pertaining to death.

His three sisters and friends swore at the funeral that they had learned their lesson and would not run out in front of that horrible mean green mustang ever again. They were soon drowned out by the cackling of crows who have heard this sort of thing before. When it was obvious the crows would not be stopped, the roadside gathering (for nobody was brave enough to go collect poor Johnny) soon dispersed in a slightly annoyed but tearful farewell leaving only a handful of squirrels who have lost more to such a fate and thus have a little more respect for the lost.

L.